Behind The Gym and In The Art Room

Operation Get the Guy of my Dreams and Defeat Stupid Hoe Day 2

I saw Rafe go behind the gym today. There's nothing wrong about that, right? WRONG! Everyone at my school knows that's where you go for the hard stuff; and by hard stuff I mean weed; and by weed I mean a fuckin' Chuck Norris WTF Motherfukin' High, Boyeee! Oh god, is my Rafe a pothead? But how could he be? He's a pastor's son--he's all honest and respectful and kind and...GEEZUS this can't be happening. Okay, so he didn't go there alone, he was with Miguel and Hunter (two well known potheads) so maybe he was just going with them for support? Yes, that's it...he was going there for support. There's no way Rafe is into those things, 'cause he knows the value of a level head and sound fitness when it comes to sports. He loves Football and I highly doubt he'll do anything to jeapordize his chances at a scholarship.

But still...

On a much darker note, I heard that HIV hoe wanted to take Rafe to the Art Room. There's nothing bad about that, except that that's where boys go for a blow; and by blow I mean blowjob; and by blowjob I mean head from a fuckin' dirty bitch! Thankfully, my Rafe-e-poo is better than that. I heard he told that skank NO! She was all, "But I'll swallow," and he was all like, "I...I dunno. If a teacher finds us they'll tell my dad and he'll KILL me!"

Atta boy! Put that hoe in her place.

Sarah didn't take that lightly because she now knows he isn't going to be easy to get. She put the first note in his locker today and he read it tentitively and threw it back amongst his things. Meanwhile, I'm still trying to figure out exactly what I'm going to do to win his heart. I still have lots of time so don't count me out just yet.

Day Two Standings

Stupid Hoe: 1 1/2                                                                    Lux: 0   

The Universe Hates Me!

Operation Get the Guy of My Dreams and Defeat Stupid Hoe. Day 1

Do you sometimes think the universe just doesn't want you to find love? 'Cause that's how I feel right now.

After two whole years of ogling the boy of my dreams from afar I finally decided to get some big hairy balls and just go for it! I saw Rafe at the caferteria today and cut in line to get next to him.

"Hi," I squeaked.

He looked up and smiled, saying "Hey" back.

I must admit I was nervous as fuck and after a long pause I said, "Nice day, right?"

NICE DAY?!

NICE FUUUKIN DAYYYYY?!

OMG I'm such a loser! I might as well kill myself now 'cause I'll die alone with lines like that.

But Rafe didn't, like, weird out or anything, he just laughed and said. "Yeah, I heard on the news today's gonna be sunny. Can't say the same for New Orleans, though."

 And I was, like, "It's never sunny there. I think it's cursed."

He said, "Um...it's because of Hurricane Isaac?"

"Oh, yeah, that...the, um, storm...thing." (What? I don't stay up to date on what's going on in the world of weather)

Thankfully, Rafe didn't think I was dumb, instead he said something that made my heart sing:

"You're pretty funny, you know that?"

HE THINKS I'M FUNNY! I'd much rather he say I'm the most gorgeous girl on the planet but I'll take it.

At that point I was dancing and doing flips on cloud nine so now was my chance. The moment of truth was about to happen; I was going to ask my guy to the Dance and then he'll say yes and he'll marry me and we'll live in a mansion by the lake. (What? Leave me to my fantasies, it's all I have)

"Hey," I said, moving my tray down the line, "I was kinda wondering if--"

"Raphael, can I talk to you," I heard someone say. And when I turned to see who it was, low and be-fucking-hold, it's the BITCH FROM HELL!


She grabbed Rafe by his arm, gave me a snide look and waltzed off with him.

"Bye," he said, waving.

And I watched as my guy left with Sarah Marshall.

I'm hoping she didn't do what I think she did but I'll sneak around tomorrow and find out.

I guess day one was a bust for me (sigh...) but tomorrow is a new day. She might have won this round but that just gave me fuel to try even harder. Oh yeah, baby, I'm totally AMPED UP!

Day One Standings

Stupid Hoe: 1                                                                           Lux: 0

The Boy Of My Dreams

Hi world! My name is Marluxia Zuckerberg, I'm fifteen years old and I live in Los Angeles California. Shout out to my fams. WOOT!

Now I bet there're two things you're probably wondering about that first sentence, right? Like, is my name really Marluxia? And am I related to Mark Zuckerberg? Ha. I get that all the time, actually. Yes, my name really is Marluxia. Funny name right? Well, my dad has this really cool job designing video games and he named me after a game character he likes a lot. I think he told me the guy is from Kingdom Hearts, or something like that. Yeah, my dad named me after a guy. (Thanks father --_--) When I first entered HS as the new kid a few years ago I got teased because of it. People told me it's the name of a bitch and that I'm an ugly evil witch and whatever, but I didn't care--I like my name; it's unique and sounds sorta dark, which is quite the opposite of my personality. Well, at least most of the time. HeHe.

So yeah, that's my name: Marluxia. But you can call me Lux. Miss Lux if you're nasty. LOL. As for my last name...well, I'll let you decide if I'm related to THE Mark Zuckerberg or not. A little mystery is good isn't it?

Anyway, there's this really cute guy at my school (I can't tell you the name so we'll just call it Kingdom High) and he's like absolutely perfect. He's blond with Justin Bieber's haircut, a cute little nose that wrinkles when he laughs, gorgeous green eyes and a smile that can pierce darkness. Oh god, he's so sexy too. He plays football so he has a tight golden body with eight pack abs (yes, not six--EIGHT!) and huge guns. I'll sometimes pretend to be reading on the bleachers and peep from behind a book as he runs plays on the field. His butt jiggles in his tight pants like a pair of fluffy marshmellows. Did I mention he's tall? How does six foot one sound? And he's only sixteen! Geezus Muffletop, if they served him on a stick I'll suck him everday. LOL.

Okay, lemme simmer for a bit...3...2...1...and I'm calm.

I love him--I really do--and I think I have a shot. Sometimes when he's passing in the halls, I'll smile at him and...

And...

He smiles back!

TOUCHDOWN! He smiles at me! He really does! And he did it today again when he passed me in the cafeteria! Can you believe it? The guy of my dreams actually smiles at me! I wonder if he thinks I'm hot? Or if he wants a wedding in Spain? Eitherway, I so totally have a shot at finally falling into his arms and making love to him all night long. Grr.

But.

BUTTT. There's. A. Twist.

Fuck. How do I say this nicely? There's this skinny cheerleading HIV bitch who calls me names, puts gum in my hair and plain ol' makes my life a living hell. She thinks she's the queen of the world and walks around with four other assholes like she's the ruler of our HS like those hoes from MEAN GIRLS!

Did I mention she's after my guy, too?

I seriously can't make this shit up. Sarah Marshall (stupid generic name, btw) is going to ask Raphael aka Rafe (my husband) to the dance two weeks from today. She's planning to do it in a series of trails, like he'll get half of a note one day and half the next and so on... It was supposed to be a secret but, of course, her shitmunchers blabbed out of spite. My guess is to let all the "would be" suitors know to back off. But I got some "notes" for miss Sarah Marshall:

YOU

AIN'T

GETTING

MY

MAN

BITCH!

I have two weeks to figure out a way to ask Rafe to the dance or lose him to that fake ass troll.

Boys are really stupid, and as much as I'd like to think Rafe isn't...well, he's a boy. They grab the first piece of good flesh they can find, and he's a pastor's son so, yeah, if Sarah gets him he's with her until she decides to dump him.

I. Cannot. Let. That. Happen! I've loved him ever since I saw him and in my heart I know he belongs with me. I might be crazy for fussing over a guy this much but I can't fight what my heart wants. It wants what it wants, and that's that.

Starting tomorrow I have to stop being a fly on the wall and make my move on Rafe. I dont' know how but I'll figure something out.

I have two weeks.

Tomorrow is day one of my quest.

Operation (Get The Guy Of My Dreams And Defeat Stupid Hoe) begins now.